Yet another fcuk up

The moral of the story is, fcuk ups due to error in knowledge are acceptable; as long as you learn from them and don't repeat in future.

Mentioning the moral in the begining is spoiling the story that you are going to tell. But there are reasons why I told the moral before I begin the story.

1. Because the moral is more important than the story I have to tell
2. Because if you understand the moral or if you don't like it, you don't have to read the story.
3. Because I am stupid.

I broke the resolution of non-alcoholism. I walked into Monoprix. Bought a bottle of cheap vodka. I was looking forward to buy something nice and expensive but luck was not that lucky. The only thing available was Poliakov.

I had reasons to get drunk at 5 o'clock in the evening. If you have to get over something, get high. What a crap! When I was done with my first drink of vodka with orange juice I realized that I wasted my 8 Euros and one resolution. Alcohols make no difference to my body and mind. Resolutions are meant to be broken. Otherwise how can you make the same resolution again ;) Went back to office checked mails. Felt like going back to apartment and resume the session. This time drink was bigger and stronger. But it did not help. What a waste!

Fcuk ups are integral part of life. I learn through fcuk ups. The root lies in the Epistemology. An attempt to answer the eternal question, "How do you know that?" and the anwer is "You never try, you never know". I am glad I tried. And I failed. But I learnt.

Fcuk ups only because you did not know something are acceptable. But once you know something and still repeating them is crime of different order. And pretending that you don't know it and lying to oneself is a sin.

I have been asking myself one question, "Why am I doing this?". Everytime I asked only non-satisfactory answer I could get was, "Because I want to." That's where I went wrong. I can't do things only because I want to. I always wondered what is wrong with Leo. Now I know. I have been living like Leo all of my life.

Anyways, you must be wondering where is the story. Forget it. There ain't any story. Only the happy ending.